Sunday, 16 August 2009

Giant Parrots and Jedi Knights Spotted In London

Early start in London today and as I climbed out from underground I was confronted with what at first glance seemed to be the latest in a long line of genetic mutations and Frankenstein style cloning.

First Dolly the sheep, pigs with human hearts, mice with human ears – now a flock of 6ft mutant Parrots had descended on Victoria station’s defenceless commuters, ready to peck my ears off and steal my nuts.

Then I noticed they all had buckets…

Turns out they were volunteers collecting for APA – money to save the Parrots apparently.

I naively thought that was the excitement for the day over and done with. However when I opened my emails I found I’d managed to unwittingly walk into a Japanese steamed bun fight.

It seems the whole idea of vegan living has enjoyed a bit of resurgence since LUSH cosmetics moved in and fired up the enthusiasm of all their staff and hoards of Japanese customers about animal rights.

Some guy has nobly started up a Vegan Society over in Japan but he seems to have run into a bit of bother with a businessman, a megalomaniac al Japanese version of Vegetarian Guides UK Alex Bourke, who runs a Japanese vegan guide business. The guides are apparently very good but the author seems to think he has copyright over the word vegan in Japan and is having kittens and a few rude blue hedgehogs about anyone who seems to think otherwise.

Sadly for the author and his plans to take over the Eastern World, he seems to have overlooked the need to look into the ins and outs of registration of any kind of trademark. In any case I’m sure the Japanese legal regulations are similar to ours and you can’t trademark words that are in common usage such as ‘Japan’ and ’Vegan’.

Anyway having blogged on about the founding of The Japanese Vegan Society I’ve now ended up in the middle of this typically vegan cat fight.

What is it with Vegans? They always seem to spend more energy fighting with each other to protect their cultish little covens than focussing on what it’s going to take to Vegducate the world about Donald Watson’s sane, logical and practical solutions to save the civilised world.

There are now more self declared members of the Jedi Knight movement (0.7% - now recognised as a ‘religion’ since the last census) than there are known vegans in the UK (0.5%) This is despite 65 years of vegan campaigning and the unfaltering logic of Watson’s original philosophy.

There are some vegans that have done more to alienate the rest of the world from veganism with their small mindedness than our children will ever be able to forgive, having inherited a desecrated planet.

Are these detractors CIA or MI5 spies with orders to infiltrate, nullify and sterilise veganism’s potency? Or are they just egotistical, short sighted, essential fat deficient, socially retarded idealists who are just desperate to try to remain the big fish in their small ponds?

No ! - Don’t look to me for answers, I was asking you!

One thing is certain - Vegan is now in the English Language to stay. There are official guidelines on it's definition and veganism now has a life of it's own so now no pompous self rightious self appointed 'guru' will ever own it - it's public. Veganism is dead - long live veganism!

1 comment:

  1. Vegans and vegetarians are targetting Croydon hoping to introduce a meat free monday will they suceed

    watch their progress at Croydon Meat Free Day